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A Completely Wild, Wild Idea--Clearly Designed by a Madman

 

I'm off my meds and my mind is beginning to wander into dark, dark places.  Just so ya know--last time I ceased being medicated, I did a few months as pre-incarceration Jeffrey Dahmer's "life coach".  So read the following analysis at your own risk.

Star-divide

Let's say--just hypothetically, you had a guy on your team who was known for one thing, and one thing only--that being shooting.  He's not known for his defense or his ball handling, but has proven himself to be an explosive scorer.

 

And let's say--this is all, of course, pure fantasy--that this season said player was averaging 52% from the field, 46% from 3 Pt land, and 91% from the line.

Now I'm no Harvey Globetrotter, but it would seem to me that this is the sort of player one might want to...oh, I don't know...take shots?

 

Quick question:  What do Jason Maxiell, Tracy McGrady, Greg Monroe, and Ben Wallace have in common?  Answer--they are the only Pistons to average fewer shots per minute that Ben Gordon.  (Will Bynum is essentially at Gordon's level--at a 37% rate on field goal attempts.)

Among the luminaries shooting at a higher rate:  Rodney Stuckey (45%), Charlie Villanueva (44%), Rip Hamilton (41%), Tayshon Prince (47%, Austin Daye (44%), Chris Wilcox (57%--weird), and Dajuan Summers (40%).

 

So, let's see--you have a highly paid player who is reknowned for his exceptional offense, who is second on the team in FG% (behind the seldom used Wilcox), and he's leading the team in 3 Pt% (aside from Summers' 3 attempts) and FT% (aside from Wilcox's 2-2).  And--recall--he's not noted for his defense.

And, yet, he is tied for 8th on the team in shots per minute, ahead of only two guys known for their defense, a rookie, and a coming-off-injury Tracy McGrady.

 

 

 

Player

Average FGA/Game

Total Minutes/Game

Average Minutes/Shot

Stuckey

12.8

31.9

2.49

Villanueva

11.5

27

2.34

Gordon

9.4

27.4

2.91

Hamilton

11.1

26

2.34

Prince

12

32

2.67

Daye

7.2

19.6

2.72

Bynum

6.3

18.3

2.94

Maxiell

4.4

20.8

4.72

Wilcox

3.5

3.7

1.06

Summers

3.8

8.7

2.28

McGrady

3.8

16

4.21

Monroe

4.3

16.5

3.83

Wallace

2.8

24.2

8.64

 

 

 

 

 

Okay, so here's where the "I am clearly mentally ill and a danger to myself and others" comes in.

 

Should Kuester, in fact, have a scenario like the one I've laid out above, why exactly the fuck is Ben Gordon being used as a....well, why isn't he being used?  There are those who think that Gordon could be at least an average defender and an average ball handler.  But to pay $11 million a year for a guy with one more upside to his game and then not utilize it?  To lose in double overtime while your best offensive player takes four shots in 29 minutes is a travesty.

I think someone needs to wake the fuck up.

(Or am I just crazy?...)

FanPosts are user-created posts from the Detroit Bad Boys community and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of all fans or the staff at DBB. The DBB staff reserves the right at any time to edit the contents of FanPosts as they reasonably see fit.

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Crap....

How do I edit this? As I mentioned elsewhere, it took me five attempts to upload, owing to poor internet connection. I suspect most prefer not to read the jumble incoherent stuff in the middle (as opposed to the jumbled incoherent parts at the beginning and end…)

My blogs: pakagankarachi.livejournal.com (dormant)
burmahunkalove.livejournal.com (occasional signs of life)

by MrHappyMushroom on Nov 29, 2010 3:36 AM EST reply actions  

You should see an edit button on the actual post. If you’re copying and pasting from Word, it usually doesn’t work.

by brgulker on Nov 29, 2010 9:17 AM EST up reply actions  

I like it

It looks artsy

Jonas, jag älskar dig! Du är vacker.

by Kriz on Nov 29, 2010 6:47 AM EST reply actions  

You know, you are right.

I’m keeping it.

(And, yeah, I saved it on a Word doc after it refused to load and the goddamned internet shut down for the sixth time. I know that living amidst a censoring military dictatorship sounds like a lot of fun. But it is really inconvenient at times…)

My blogs: pakagankarachi.livejournal.com (dormant)
burmahunkalove.livejournal.com (occasional signs of life)

by MrHappyMushroom on Nov 29, 2010 10:12 AM EST up reply actions  

Nah...

My perfectionist streak wouldn’t let me read the gibberish. It’s now pure, coherent, gold. Thank you, bgulker.

My blogs: pakagankarachi.livejournal.com (dormant)
burmahunkalove.livejournal.com (occasional signs of life)

by MrHappyMushroom on Nov 29, 2010 10:21 AM EST up reply actions  

You’re exactly correct. BG’s a specialist. He’s not being used relative to his specialty. I don’t get it.

by brgulker on Nov 29, 2010 11:27 AM EST reply actions  

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