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Happy birthday to me... Pistons at Timberwolves game thread

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It's my birthday, and the Pistons are in town. Everybody wins. If you're watching on TV, I'll be the guy with a melancholic look on his face.

Game Tips at 8:00 P.M. EST

Detroit Pistons: 7-16 (2-11 road)

Minnesota Timberwolves: 5-17 (4-6 home)

Oppo Research:

Kevin Love is a fascinating case study in NBA statistics. The dude is putting up lights-out numbers, Kevin Garnett numbers, even. And yet, it seems obvious that those numbers aren't telling the whole story.
Here's the thing. Statistics usually do a good job of telling us stuff about a player that does not necessarily show up on the stat sheet. A 20-10 guy is, typically, dominant on both ends of the floor, since his scoring and athleticism usually produce point without allowing them.
K-Love, on the other hand, is a terrible defender. I don't know why this is. He obviously isn't a slouch, and if you can rebound as prolifically as he does, it stands to reason you should be able to stop your man. Further, he is a bit of a black hole on offense. His three point shooting is great, but he doesn't really have any other tools in his kit.
So we are left with a player whose numbers suggest superstardom, but whose impact hovers around slightly above average.
Also, the Minnesota Timberwolves have other players.

Keys to the Game:

Don't let Love go for 40-40:That would just be embarassing.

Eat some babies: Thanks to injuries and hobbled players, the Timberwolves don't have any interior presence. Tell me how Jason Maxiell doesn't put career numbers in this context.

Don't embarrass me: It's my birthday, dammit!

Question of the Game:

How are the Pistons going to get out of here? We are slated for the worst blizzard in two decades tonight. If any Pistons are stranded, and just want to chill at my pad, our doors are open.

Link ta Drink:

Canis Hoopus