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Pistons 75, Suns 74: MFWB to the MF rescue, MFers

To start, a bit of history. The last time the Pistons beat the Suns, they did so in overtime on a strong performance by both Chauncey Billups and Rasheed Wallace. Three years and five losses later, the new look Pistons finally earned a win against the Suns. This isn't just a simple dub in the game logs, this was a pounding of historic magnitude. If you watched the game, you probably think I'm out of my mind for making that statement.

If you loved last night's game against the Nets, tonight's game against the Suns was just as fun. It was the most unwatchable, ugly and disheartening basketball you can find in the modern NBA, but somehow the Pistons squeaked out a win. Not just a win, but a win that hasn't been dropped on Phoenix in five years-- Phoenix has only scored less than 74 points 11 times in franchise history, the last time being March of 2006. Had Channing Frye not taken that last second, uncontested, stat-padding 3-pointer, this would have been one of two of the lowest point totals in Phoenix Suns history. Why is this important? Because the Suns are notoriously score-y, lauded for putting up ridiculous numbers night-in, night-out.

How the hell did Detroit do this? It all happened in the 4th quarter, and it all happened in the palms of MFWB (that stands for Mightily Fast William of Bynum to those new to DBB). Okay, to be fair, it was the Will Bynum and Austin Daye show, both of which combined for the numbers that put Detroit over the top in the closing minutes. At this point, the Pistons were down 17 points, the average margin of their last five losses to Phoenix. Bynum was active on both ends of the floor, stripping the ball from Steve Nash, hitting lay-ups, drawing fouls and draining jumpers. Daye and Bynum led Detroit in +/- with +6 and +5 respectively, sealing the deal on a game that was held by Tayshaun Prince while everything else was pretty much falling apart.

This game was ugly in a sense that you need to add a few more g's to that word-- you know, ugggggly. It was not fun to watch. The 3rd quarter was enough to force call-waiting at the suicide hotline, it felt like you were watching the last game this franchise would ever play. Fortunately, Tayshaun Prince managed to keep the ball alive with 17 points, 13 rebounds and 5 assists, a rather unreal performance in light of some pretty constant criticism from yours truly and otherwise.

As the score suggests, this win was as close as it gets, and it almost got away from the Pistons. Will Bynum missed a free throw to open up a 3-point lead with less than a minute to play, but fortunately Tayshaun Prince grabbed the offensive rebound and an immediate foul. He, too, missed a free throw, so Detroit had a 3-point margin in the closing seconds of the game. But before Phoenix could hit an inbound pass to run their final play, Rodney Stuckey decided to foul Steve Nash, apparently just to give everyone watching a massive rage headache. With the margin now at 2, favoring Detroit, Channing Frye missed a 3-pointer that MFWB rebounded and then immediately took the foul to close out the game.

This game was ugly. It was the kind of game you'd wake up to in bed the morning after a bender and decide, not only will I never drink again, I will immediately commit to the priesthood. Castration might even be in order. But somehow, some way, the Pistons won, and it's all on the shoulders of our tiniest player with a heart of gold, MF Will Bynum. Thanks Will. If anything at all, at least you shut Eddie Johnson's shit-eating mouth until we play Phoenix again. That dude is aching for Ben Wallace to show up at his house at 4:00 a.m. with a sledge hammer and a smile. "You think it's a joke that I should even be considered for the Hall of Fame? That's real interesting, Eddie. Let's talk about it. Meanwhile, let's talk about whether your knees should be considered for the Hall of Walking Out the Door Tomorrow Morning".

If you Tivo'd/DVR'd this game, do yourself a favor. Don't watch it. It was painful. If anything, put on your Bynum jersey and watch the last five minutes. Tonight, Will Bynum earned Detroit a win, and a good portion of that paycheck he received this summer.